7 Fun Facts From That Time I Met Bigfoot

This is my "I kind of hate myself, but had
 to see" look. Strangely enough, it's a little
blurry, like most Bigfoot photos.

Tuesday evening I went to the Alamo Drafthouse for the tour stop of Bigfoot hunter Rick Dyer's alleged Bigfoot corpse. Dyer is not well-liked, to put it nicely, by most of the Bigfoot community, but since I have a middle grade novel manuscript about a girl with cryptozoologist parents, I pretty much had to go. You know, research. And one of the characters in the book, Jethro Muggins, wants to hunt down and kill the Lake Champlain monster, so attending a presentation by someone who claims to have killed Bigfoot (with no regrets) seemed especially appropriate.

(So, I was there as a curious writer; I'm not a bigfooter or any kind of expert on cryptids, and there are plenty of people who are knowledgeable about the field who've written about Rick Dyer and his antics, and those are easy to find through an online search if you want to learn more).

The Q&A session was quite entertaining, lively, and unintentionally funny. Here are just a few of my favorite moments from the night:

1. I knew we were in for a good night when an announcement on the screen advised us that the presentation was "...strickly for educational purpose's." [sic that to infinity]

2. The manager told us before the show that few members of Dyer's Team Tracker weren't able to attend this leg of the tour, since they're in Dallas protecting a woman's house from a Bigfoot attack. This is probably the greatest thing I've ever heard.

3. Dyer says he was wearing only boxer shorts when he shot the Bigfoot, which was running away from him after taking the rack of ribs that he'd bought as bait from Wal-Mart.

4. Dyer's new Porche and his $100,000 RV are proof that his Bigfoot is real, because why would people pay him to see something fake? I don't see how any of us can find anything wrong with that logic.

5. When asked how he moved the 800-pound corpse after killing it, he says that he carried it to a rented freezer truck with the help of "several homeless people." Since he'd claimed an investor paid him $9 million for the body, the interviewer said that maybe it would've been nice to have used a little of that money to buy a house for those homeless people. Dyer thought that was pretty funny. On another note, those are the most ripped homeless people ever.

From there the corpse was hauled to a university for DNA testing. No word on what university or when he'll reveal the results of that DNA evidence.

6. An audience member asked Dyer why anyone should believe his claims, since he's been involved in hoaxes before, like this one in 2008 in which the Bigfoot he'd captured turned out to be a costume. He said that he really did have a Bigfoot body back then, but "the government" confiscated it. Then he got caught up in the hoax-y part, purchasing a Bigfoot suit so he'd have something to show people who'd been waiting to see the body.

Oh, and if you're wondering what branch of government shows up to take your Bigfoot corpse? "They arrived in black helicopters, and they wore black suits. So, The Men In Black."

Wait, does this mean Bigfoot is an alien? I'm confused.

7. After the presentation we got to view the body in its glass case. A man in front of me asked why the
fingers of the hands seemed fused together, and the Team Tracker attendant said that it's because of the resin used in taxidermy. "You know, like when you get a deer stuffed." I admit I'm no taxidermist, and I'm no hunter, but, um, what?

I heard later that Dyer tells a different story about the unifinger: Bigfoot uses friction to start fire with his hands, and his hands are scarred from catching fire. I imagine that incident going something like this:



So there you have it, just a few of the evening's highlights. Here's a parting shot from the big guy himself:

Darn you, honey BBQ sauce

Catching Up

It's been a long time since I've done a post, so let's catch up! Where in the world have I been and what have I been up to?

One reason I've been online less is that at the beginning of April I woke up with pain from my upper back to my hand that was so bad, the only comfortable position I could find was flat on my back with my arm raised. Not super-conducive to productivity. I'd had similar pain in the fall, but it came on more gradually then. Each time, it's happened after extended periods of writing, like if I'm really trying to get a project done. Which backfires, of course, if I'm then sidelined for weeks at a time with the nerd's version of a sports injury.

Thankfully it's gotten better, a little at a time, with rest, muscle relaxers, massage therapy, stretching, and seeing the chiropractor more often than my family. I have to remember now when I'm writing to take breaks more often, and it helps a lot to keep the computer at eye level. I think the worst thing I did was sit on the couch while looking down at the laptop for hours on end. So now I elevate it with a lap desk, and for times I'm working at my actual desk, I got this fancypants chair that has adjustable everything and costs a lot less than other ergonomic chairs. Also I'm using the dictation feature on the iPhone and the laptop when I can, especially for composing emails and texting. I'd love to be able to use it for drafting a story, but it's hard for me to dictate a story instead of typing or writing it by hand. I hope to get used to it with some practice so I can use it more often and give the arm a rest.

But the good news is I've finally finished drafting the next midgrade novel! It needs revising before it's editor-ready, but it feels great to have a good draft from beginning to end.

On to more happy news...

This little girl now lives at my house.

Not sure about these new people yet, but they seem nice

Her name is Holly and she's from Houston Cocker Spaniel Rescue. We took her in to foster her at first, but last time we said we'd "foster" a dog we kept her for the rest of her life, so I was pretty sure she was here to stay.






I mean, just look how she sleeps.



I even finalized the adoption after she chewed my MacBook cord in two. I'd say that's love.

She's very sweet, but quite the escape artist, so we do have to keep an eye on her. She got from our fenced-in back yard to the neighbors', squeezes through the cat door to get to the garage, and got from the enclosed play yard at doggie day care into the staff office. What could possibly be of interest in the office? I would love to know.

And in CHAINED news, I have some shiny new awards! The book received a South Asia Book Award honor, and the SCBWI Crystal Kite Award for the Texas/Oklahoma region. I'm so honored about the recognition and to be in such amazing company with the other recipients.

Also, I have a new curriculum guide! Something I'd always thought I would get around to doing myself, but never did, so I decided to get the fabulous Debbie Gonzales to make one for me, and I'm so happy with the results.

Finally, I did some traveling recently, to the Kindling Words West retreat in Taos, New Mexico. It's a magical place where authors get a week to just focus on their work and talk to other authors about books and such. (And maybe a little shopping). We did have short workshops in the mornings, led by the awesome Nikki Grimes, but had the rest of the days to ourselves. Nikki's workshops were about poetry, which I've never really ventured into, but I know that what we learned from her will help my novel writing. I'd like to write a separate post about some of what I learned, so I'll save more of that for later this week.

Holly was really happy to see me when I got back, but she might have been happier about this bone o' bacon I gave her.

The bacon smile. I think a lot of us can relate.

Plotting For the Non-Plotter: Organized Brainstorming

I'm not very organized. There are a couple layers of things covering my desk right now, for example, but I sort of know where things are. Some organizing is good for me, though, to avoid wasted time searching for things or recreating my entire year on an Excel document when it's tax time.

Same goes for my writing--I'm not much of a plotter, since I like to see the story unfold as I go. Also I usually have an idea of a few scenes that will show up at some point, so that's kind of like that knowing approximately where things are on or around my desk. But it does help to have an idea where I'm going so I don't end up chasing something shiny down a trail to randomland. Plus, I decided that my next midgrade novel will have a mystery, so I need to do enough plotting to make sure everything comes together. And there are ways for us pantsers to plot that give us a little guidance without making us feel boxed in.

I mentioned in a weekend post that I attended a brainstorming session at a local write-a-thon that was super-helpful in working out the plot of that next midgrade novel. I'd done some brainstorming on the story already, but it was kind of like "I have this character, and her family, and I think I know where they'll go, and some other stuff that happens."

Not quite enough to know where I was going. But Lynn Lorenz, who led the brainstorming sessions, took out her magical pad of paper and pen and started asking questions and writing. In about twenty minutes I left with this:

Hard to decipher if you weren't there, but I have a list of possible "culprits" for the mystery; one of those will be the real explanation or guilty party, and I'll use some of the others as red herrings. I'm not even sure yet which is going to be the real culprit yet, so I have the flexibility to allow that to be revealed as I write.

In addition to listing qualities of each character, we discussed how they're connected to one another; that's more plotting, since it's about their relationships. I'd had a minor character in mind, a cute boy that the main character meets along the way, but he'll have a bigger part than just looking cute now-- he'll work with the main character Nessie to try to solve the mystery. He may even have a clue he doesn't know is a clue. And of course Nessie's little brother will be trying to hang out with them all the time.

We also listed things about the setting (Lake Champlain, I'm thinking, and not just 'cause it'd make an awesome research trip) to consider as I write the story.

When discussing plotting again in a later session, Lynn showed a kind of plotting that reminded me of the Beat Sheet from Save the Cat!, another great resource for do-able plotting for the reluctant plotter, although this is even more flexible.

Dividing your book into four approximately equal parts, mark at the end of each section where an important turning point for your character will be. You can draw a chart on paper, but sticky notes on a posterboard or wall is more fun.

So the plan for a 20-chapter book would look like this, with one sticky note representing one chapter:

That first turning point will probably be that "point of no return," when your character has left the old life behind and is starting the new one. Knowing the other important turning points that will come up throughout the character's journey helps avoid writing a story that sags in the middle. After you figure out what those turning points will be, go back and write the scenes needed for your character to get to each one. On the remaining sticky notes you can fill in what will happen in the chapters leading up to each turning point.

For more plotting help, here are a couple of awesome resources I found online recently:

Adventures in Children's Publishing's "Plotting Made Easy" Complications Worksheet
Martha Alderson, aka The Plot Whisperer, has a 27-part series about plotting on her YouTube channel.
Janice Hardy's Tips for Plotting Your Novel on Chris Eboch's blog

Share in the comments your favorite ways to plot! Even those of us who don't like to plot can benefit from doing just enough to keep us from getting distracted from what's important.

Perks of Being a Writer: The Things I Can Call "Work"

If you're a writer, you've probably heard the advice, "Don't quit your day job." It's good advice; most writers aren't going to earn enough money from the writing career to make it their only source of income.

I still have to work, but summer is a slow time for the day job. So it's not a paycheck-friendly time, but the upside is I have plenty of time to write. And one of the perks of being a writer is that there are so many things we can label "Work" that other people can't.

Why yes, I am busy doing research

Watching TV
The midgrade novel I'm working on is about a girl whose parents are cryptozoologists. Last Thursday there was a MonsterQuest marathon on The History Channel, and I took notes while watching. That is a productive day of research, people. And the young adult novel I'm revising, Reasons For Leaving, has a subplot about a Ponzi scheme, so the same goes for Bernie Madoff documentaries. For CHAINED it was anything about elephants.

Reading

How will I ever get all this work done?

To be a great writer, you have to read a lot. So now when I read, I'm not just enjoying a good book, I'm perfecting my craft. Each book is like a mini-workshop.

Eavesdropping
I'm not being nosy, I'm studying realistic dialogue.
Any place you visit is a source for potential new characters or story ideas. Even if you're somewhere you don't want to be, you might pick up a bit of a conversation or get an idea for a plot thread or character trait that can will find its way into a book.

Surfing the Internet
I can't remember how we all got by before the Internet. That was awful, wasn't it, all of us sitting around waiting for Google to show up? Now, spend one minute searching for whatever you're interested in, and you have more information than you know what to do with. And there are countless resources for writers out there, so we always have something to read about how to be a better writer.

Watching movies
Similar to the "reading" perk: novelists can learn a lot about writing from screenwriters, so when we watch movies we're also learning about good storytelling. I'm pretty sure this means that popcorn is tax-deductible.

Thinking
No, I'm not staring into space, I'm plotting.

There are probably more we could add to the list--what are your favorite work-that-doesn't-look-like-work activities? I'll take a break from looking out the window to read your comments.